i love to discover music for myself. i bumped into a festival’s website and it turned out to be a treasure island. here are some samples of the gems i just found:
i think i am starting to give up the hope that life will ever get “normal”. not that i really wanna have a so called normal life but sometimes i could use some average not-swinging-pendulum-like-days. but than again i guess that wouldn’t be me. well yeah i’ve been thinking a lot lately about a lot of things :D (wow can you tell there is an other very put together blog on the way here?) i’ve been thinking how last year i was just so happy to know nothing about the future, to not even care about what’s next, just enjoying every day as it came my way, enjoying the process of the healing of the soul. it was a great summer. here i am a year later and it couldn’t be more different. i am facing summer with question marks, visualizing at least three versions of these months depending on events that need to happen before i can tell which version is the winner. i feel like a duracel-bunny who is all turned on but buzzing away in vain getting stuck in an obstacle with the tiny wheels going on and on and on….you get the picture. i kinda suspect it’s all God though, when i started getting comfortable He dropped a few bombs to shake it aaallllll up :P now i like to be shaken all up. as much as i hate change i love change. there is always a new chance to make it “this time”. to not screw up where i screwed up before. to discover something i never knew was possible. i had a chance to actually pursue acting and it’s already been quite a ride and i have not done anything yet… i am discovering such complex things about God through this type of art, i truly can say i understand the world so much better than before. and i finally came to understand myself too. not too bad, reaching 30 and all…i guess it’s pretty good timing. i’ve been discovering the reality of experiencing faith without emotions. now that’s an amazing accomplishment granted i am me. but it’s been astonishing how God started showing Himself without actually showing Himself through me acting on the truths of Scripture without worrying about “feeling God” and “hearing Him” and “feeling His Spirit”. He is of course here, and with me and in me, but you know what i mean. anyways, i know it’s not because i am such a great person. i know it is His grace. but i am so thankful He took me on this ride. learning how to act on the character of God and live your everyday mundane moments based on who He is, ignoring all the crap that surrounds you in this world is amazing. i suspect it won’t end with my 30th birthday….but heck am i grateful i didn’t wait longer to start learning this lesson. i found it is actually really helpful and makes making decisions easier when you simply (huh, simply…love this word) keep in mind who God is and that we live for a higher goal and 99% of the things on earth don’t matter really. i mean, we live for eternity and who cares what people say about me right? yeah right:) this has been something i kept telling myself so many times in this past year or so. it’s a rather enlightening discovery to say the least. so i guess i keep telling myself that nothing will ever separate me from the love of Christ and wait until the bunny can launch into space…or wherever…
so, i haven’t been writing ’cause there was/is so much i wanted to write about that i didn’t know where to begin :D i know, the lamest excuse ever and i always start with excuses :D oh man…anyways, i am already cracking up here. i am in a pretty ridiculous state of mind right now. i’ve been pretty much in a surreal haze of existence anyways for a while but it only seems to intensify. it has started in february when i started an acting course that i was planning on taking in april. God so knew i needed something in that month otherwise i would have killed myself with anything that was within reach. well obviously i am exaggerating like i always do but seriously, it was THE nastiest month ever, save the fact i was doing an acting course. which by the way turned my life (yet again) upside down. i can’t even find words that would be adequate enough to describe the impact this has made on my life. basically, i found my missing link to my mental health :D and if that doesn’t make any sense to you i don’t blame you. but in all seriousness i came alive and for the first time after long years i felt there was something to get up for. that God actually put a huge puzzle piece in it’s place. i have learnt so much about myself in one months through this, so many aspects of my soul and mind have been made clear before me that i was going crazy from excitement. it is a HUGE thing to feel alive. i still struggle with words ’cause really, it is a HUGE thing that i can look ahead on the road that is my life and say “there is something for me there”. i thought unless i understood my past (recent and less recent alike) i wouldn’t be able to fully move on and not be scared of the life that is before me. i still don’t fully understand the past and many aspects of it will need much more time to be understood i reckon, but yesterday, after a very long silence God did something in me as i was sitting at a church i’ve never been before. it gave me goos bumps and i just knew something has ended and something is coming that only God knows what it is. and the only thing i could say and think of was that i am saying yes to that. still scared a little and very cautious in treading the path but as i was going home i knew something was left behind that afternoon in church. fear has lifted up and there was peace and life and hope for life and God’s love was there. and i believed His love. i didn’t fight it or struggled to comprehend it. mind you i will never fully comprehend it but there in that moment i experienced it in a way i haven’t before. in the middle of Soho :D (that would make a great song actually…) anyways, i think in my lame way i am trying to let you all know, you all who still accompany me on my journey to myself, that i am doing well now. thanks for your company and helping hand and presence. i am pretty sure that all those prayers you uttered have something to do with this… :) love you all, you all know who you are :)
my name is luca, i am 29 years old and i am obsessed with film awards and the sort. so i thought i dedicate a blog entry to all the people and films that made me smile in the past few weeks. first of all i am thrilled to see Bibliotheque Pascal by Hajdu Szabolcs took on the Berlinale like a whirlwind after getting the grand prize at the Budapest Film Festival. I really wanna see the film. http://hvg.hu/kultura/20100208_41_magyar_filmszemle_bibliotheque_pascal I screamed when Colin Firth got the BAFTA for his role on A Single Man. such an exceptional movie and he is just grand in it. plus his speech cracked me up. and turns out we live in the same neighbourhood. i sure hope we shop in the same grocery store…Carrey Muligan is definitely some one to keep an eye on too. i totally envy her role in An Education. and as for Christoph Waltz…praise God for Tarantino and his casting director. where has this man been?!?!? he deserved his BAFTA, his Golden Globe and his Oscar too. and as for the most infamous and most coveted golden statuette…thank you Jeff Bridges for being a “normal” person in the acting world. even if i really wanted to see Colin walk away with the little fellow, it truly was Jeff’s time, what can i say. and yes, i love Sandra Bullock and i am STOKED for her. though haven’t seen the movie yet, that women surely is unique. now as for Avatar, i am really thankful for the Oscar people that they did NOT give tons of awards to them. i am just really pleasantly surprised with that. i haven’t seen the Hurt Locker, but i want to. i need to see what the buzz is about it. i understand the message and the political situation but i just hope it didn’t triumph at every major events only because of the theme and all…i definitely liked Bigelow’s attitude. and befor i close, let me just say that i love Vera Farmiga. she was already exceptional in The Departed and i think she deserved the Oscar nod for Up in the Air, but C’MON GIRL, WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING WITH THAT DRESS?!?!??!
just watched the latest episode of house. i love that show so much it’s almost unbelievable. anyways, this week’s case was a blogger women, who would literally blog like 3-4-5 times a day, about practically everything. it was funny and you kinda felt sorry for her, ‘casue she had an awesome (read very handsome) boyfriend and she would not be able to discuss things with him the way she could let it out on her blog. that’s where i felt sorry for her and also made me wonder. and…well, i am not really going anywhere with this. but it is still a cool opening paragraph, isn’t it? :D
well, winter is over, i guess, i hope, i suppose, i BELIEVE IT. maybe if i believe it it will really happen. indeed it was raining today and was slightly warmer than befor. so there. so british of me, starting with detailed description of the weather. but indeed, it’s a sheer miracle that i survived winter. january and february are my most dreaded months. for a reason. and indeed, they were dreadful months, except of some highlights that made them a little less dreadful. like acting classes in february. that kind of gave my life a bizarre and surreal twist. i am so bizarrely and surreally twisted now…for good…if that wasn’t obvious enough anyways…i like this twist, i think i’ll keep it. i will love it and nurture it and hold it dear. it will have a nice and warm home with me, this twist. i will cherish it my whole life and make it a priority. i hope it will stay with me for good and will love me in return. the twist that is.
hello you world of great words and great characters, great scenes and great souls, great plots and great thoughts, hello theater, i’ve loved you all my life, i’ve missed you and will never abandon you again. yours, lu